That’s right.

I made myself fail MORE.

It turned out, this was the smartest thing I’ve ever done.

See the below video where I explain what it made me realize & how it can change your life too.

Hands down it’s the best goal you can ever set for yourself too.

You think failure is bad…but what if it is just the stepping stone to success?

You ti

My positivity rant:

(which btw, this is my new series. I have so much to share. Every day I am going to take you along for a coffee run with me, so grab a cup o’ Joe & let’s talk about life.)

Read that ONE more time.

This is your show & you are the star of it.

Start acting like it.

You always hear this garbage talk of “yay! Main character energy!” but how many people act like it?

How many people literally grabbed the pen of their lives and started writing the most amazing story of their lives?

Are you holding the pen?

Are you writing each page?

Or are you sitting there, waiting, wishing for something to happen.

Now, Sitting, Waiting, & Wishing is a great song by Jack Johnson.

It, however, is not a good strategy for life.

When it comes to life, I much prefer this: Heroes by Alesso

I like to think about the Confetti reigning down on me, watching a highlight film of my life, tears streaming down my face for all the amazing things we’ve done, with all the amazing people, and just what an amazing time we had.

“What a ride - the ride of a lifetime !!” we will all say.

Now, you are a diligent reader of my blog so you know one thing very well.

This is your one & only life.

This is NOT your practice life.

This is all you get.

Your life will be what you make it.

WHAT YOU MAKE IT.

No one is coming to save you.

Mommy, Daddy, your friends can’t do it for you.

Not even your boss can do it for you.

It’s all up to you.

This is a very important quote.

Nothing ever happens unless you cause it to.

Nothing good ever just falls into your lap.

You have to make your own luck.

You have to take ownership of your own life.

A moving man (or woman) will always meet his (or her) luck.

But it starts with taking action.

Here’s a way I like to think of it:

It’s your life on the line - you should WANT to be the one taking the big shot.

Issue is, you don’t.

You’re scared.

You hesistate.

You’re playing it safely.

You’re not even in the game.

You could be balling but you’re afraid to lace em up and try.

Who could you be if you just tried??

But look at you. Look at your life.

Are you trying?

Are you going for it?

Are you being the hero of your own life?

Is the pen in your hands??

Are you directing your own movie??

Probably not!

Because you’re afraid to be seen trying.

You’re afraid of what people think.

You’re afraid to fail.

Well, who gives a fuck.

This is YOUR life.

These 3 quotes helped me a lot:

1. “At some point, you gotta decide for yourself who you’re gonna be. Can’t let nobody make that decision for you.” - Moonlight

2. “This is who I am - and it’s too late to start apologizing.” - Peter Barton

3. “One day, you’ll find that you’re the hero you’ve been looking for” - James Stewart

That day is today.

The ball is in your hands.

Understand that to live a truly remarkable life you have to

Do things your own way & take your own path.

When you do that, you will get criticized, judged, made fun of, doubted, etc.

But who gives a f - you giving yourself the best possible life you can.

Think of your heroes.

Think of the criticism they faced and CONTINUE TO face.

Get comfortable with rocking the boat.

One of my friends even said to me:

“I’m always amazed how you stay so top of mind with everyone. You probably don’t know it, but people are always talking about you.”

So that means people are talking behind my back.

I sure hope it’s good things! But I am sure there is some criticism in there too.

Oh well.

The only way to avoid criticism is to say nothing, do nothing, be nothing.

Now, is that the life you want to live?

Is that a life deserving of confetti reigning down on you at the end?

No.

Michael Jordan says “winning has a price” and he’s right.

Now, ultimately, none of this matters.

What matters is living the best possible life you can for yourself.

You get one life in this body. One life as this version of you.

You OWE it to yourself to create the very best life you possibly can for yourself.

No one else can do it for you.

The pen is in your hands.

Hancock that MFer.

You are writing the story of your life - make sure it’s the one that will bring happy tears to your eyes when you watch it back.

Person A thinks they can.

Person B thinks they cannot.

They are both right.

So, you are Sam Darnold.

You went from hot shot college QB (at USC, nonetheless), was the 3rd selection in your draft, signed a $50M+ contract.

Life is pretty great…

Until you start “seeing ghosts"“ on the field, play so badly that you aren’t just cut…but you become a laughing stock of the league.

You are written off.

It looks like that will be your career - a failure.

You are Bad Bunny.

You are working as a cashier at a grocery store (true story).

You have a dream of being a musician.

You spend nights making music and uploading them to Soundcloud.

Clearly, with the way their careers started you wouldn’t think they would be the Stars of Super Bowl 60.

So how did they get there?

What powered them to be great?

What powers anyone to be great?

Well, this is one of my favorite topics.

I spent the past 5 years studying all the greats, and if they all share one thing in common, it’s this:

SELF BELIEF

These are two of my favorite videos that not only changed how I thought about myself, but they rewired my mindset.

What follows is what became the code to my own self belief & my confidence and it will be the cornerstone for your confidence & mindset so that you too can do great things & be the star of the show.

Read more

Backwards innit?

They say confidence comes from doing successful enough times (10,000 hour rule) that you then KNOW you can do it.

Like tying your shoes. You used to learn how to do it, and weren’t that good.

But you’ve done it so much that know you’re confident in your ability to tie your shoes.

Issue is: you don’t have time to waste.

Your life is happening right NOW.

Your soulmate could be in the same coffee shop as you tomorrow morning.

If you don’t have the confidence, you might miss your best chance at happiness ever…

So, here’s the faster way to become confident.

Read more

The only thing standing between you & the life you’re capable of.

Literally lessons in there.

Look at how much the pony psyched himself up (had to turn away !!)

then look at how great it feels to overcome your fears !!!!!!

Literally jumping for joy.

This gets my hyped writing this - I can’t wait to see the look on your face when you do it too !!

Let me show you how to do it.

Mind you, what I am about to explain is exactly how I changed my life.

One of the things I am most proud of the past 5 years is how I developing my courage to take risks.

I wasn’t always so confident, so bold, so eager to take risks.

So aggressive in how I played life.

Younger me used to stick with the crowd.

I was a bit of a chicken honestly.

He would’ve NEVER been the one to move across the country where he didn’t know anyone.

(If you want to read about why I did that, see here)

But what I realized in 2021 completely changed my approach to life.

This is the realization that started it all:

George Clooney said it best:

Read more

and, let’s be honest...it’s time you finally do it...

It’s not cute anymore. Last year, you said this year.

It’s time you become the person YOU WANT to be - the version of you with a sculpted physique like a Greek god/goddess.

“The ultimate act of respect towards the creator is sculpting a beautiful physique and fulfilling your potential. A person who walks around as a work of art is a rare soul who has conquered themselves, their mind, and their surroundings.”

And really...you owe that to yourself.

Most would not be honest enough to admit this, but life really is better with 6-pack abs and veins popping out of your biceps.

BELOW is my exact workout routine & diet that keeps me in tip-top shape for the past 5 years, while living a fun life/traveling/drinking/etc:

WEEKLY WORKOUT ROUTINE

• Monday: Strength: Full body weight lifting.
  ~10 mins each body part (biceps, chest, shoulders, back, triceps, legs)
  I prefer to be a lean, mean, fighting machine, so I mostly do lighter weights and focus on going slowly to increase time under attention.
  You need to be getting after it when you’re working out. Heart rate 120+ and you should leave dripping sweat. Far too many of y’all go to the gym just to stare at your phones…if you want to be shaped like a phone, then keep doing that.
  Peloton has good guided classes

• Tuesday: high intensity cardio (calorie burner)
  1 hour of cardio
  Really get after it. Want to get your heart rate peaking 170bpm+
  Peloton is GREAT (sneaky leg day)
  Or I’ll run 6 miles trying to mix in intervals

• Wednesday: Pilates (tone) + zone 2 cardio (burn fat)
  Pilates is INCREDIBLE for core and toning
  At night, I will do a fat-burning treadmil walk: 12 incline 3 speed 1 hour.
  Want your heart rate 120-140 to burn fat
  Good time to call family, listen to a podcast, manifest

• Thursday: repeat strength

• Friday: repeat cardio

• Saturday: you can rest, but I like to either do zone 2 or light jog (good hangover cure)

• Sunday: do something active during the day - walk, surf, golf, etc. and then at night zone 2 cardio incline walk or light 5/6 mile jog. Bonus = Sunday is for gratitude and reflection. These long walks / jogs turned into meditation for me. It’s how I figured out my purpose and how best to play the game of life

• 10 mins of abs everyday. Not negotiable

• Try to get in a lot of zone 2 cardio when you can (have a call, on the phone, doomscrolling, etc.) 12 incline, 3 speed, 30-60 mins on the treadmil. Want your heart rate 120-140 to burn fat

  

At the end of the day, the formula is calories in vs. calories out.

If you are trying to cut down, I HIGHLY recommend vastly increasing the amount of cardio you do.

As you can see, cardio is the bulk of my workout routine, and I would suggest you do more too. You don’t want to be big and bulky...no one likes that except gym bros...you want abs and veins...those can’t show when they are covered up by excess fat.

To lose weight, you need to be in a caloric deficit. There are 2 ways to do that: 1) eat less or 2) burn more. A mix of both is the optimal equation. Don’t starve yourself - you starve yourself of vital nutrients to your body…not good long-term.

This brings us to the next part of the equation…

DIET

Abs are made in the kitchen

Again, it’s calories in vs. calories out.

That said, I don’t track macros or calories. I don’t believe in that. Live a little…

At the same time, food is fuel. You need to be fueling yourself properly.

Inputs = outputs. What you put in is what you get out. I fuel my body with the highest quality foods & nutrients. Whole foods, fruits, direct from the source stuff none of that processed BS.

How I fuel:

• Breakfast - I don’t eat breakfast; I intermittently fast.
  Wake up and chug a ton of water. BANG. You get very dehydrated overnight, replenish.
  Spa Water: half a lemon,

  shilajit

  (has like all the trace minerals your body needs or some shit idk - good for energy/brain/immunity), &

  tumeric

  in a water. Chug that. Bang.
  Then I have coffee. Make it however you want, just avoid lots of sugar. Some coffees already set you back like 400+ calories before the day starts. Be careful….
  btw - if you want to have pearly white teeth, make sure you always brush your teeth after drinking coffee. At the very least, swish water around your mouth…

• Lunch/Dinner
  I eat one of 3 things for 90% of my meals:
  1. Ground beef/bison, eggs + onion, spinach, avocado, and feta cheese
  Tons of protein, eggs are nature’s superfood, spinach for greens, and avocado for healthy fats. It’s perfect
  2. High-protein salad
  3. Protein plate (salmon/steak/chicken/tuna) with vegetables
  My general rules of thumb:
  Eating should be intuitive, not punishment. Eat what you feel. That said, make smart choices
  On days I lift, I definitely try to have more protein, but I don’t freak out about hitting my protein goals, I find that makes me over eat
  On cardio days, I go lighter and will aim to eat 2 salads. Remember, it’s calories in vs calories out
  Of course I go out for dinner plenty and I am not a health freak about it. Treat yourself & eat what you want, just try to be smart
  I don’t eat many carbs. I get most my carbs from fruits…but sweet potato, rice, overnight oats would be my choice not rigatoni alfredo…

• Snacking - try to snack healthily - this can kill you if not
  Beef jerky: filling + high protein
  Fruit: blueberries, raspberries, kiwis, apples, grapes, and cherries (summer) are always around my house
  All very good for you, especially your skin/bodily systems
  Carrots/Cucumber + hummus/dips
  Secret to glowing skin: 3 carrots a day + coconut oil. (Sephora hates him for this one secret…)
  Overnight oats can be great. I used to be in a groove making these - had some fire recipes…they even called me the Michael Jordan of Overnight Oats…haven’t made in a while tho…

• Supplements:
  Overall, I don’t take many. I rely on diet / lifestyle to get what I need.
  I used to, stopped taking them (all marketing) and have actually felt 100x better - more energetic, stronger, leaner
  Go to protein powder (clean and lean) (LINK)
  Go to greens supplement (LINK)
  Put it all in a list on Amazon storefront for more (LINK)

• Avoid: processed foods, fast food, lots of carbs, and SUGAR

Overall, the goal of all this is not punishment. It is a treat - you are taking care of your body.

They say every day you spend in the gym is an extra day you aren’t in the hospital when you’re older.

The same with eating healthily. Inputs = outputs. If you want a strong body, a flourishing operating system, glowing skin…you must be glowing on the inside. Put the highest quality things into your body.

Sports cars run on better gas than Honda’s…you are the same.

ABOVE ALL, you have to learn to LOVE the work.

We all want a 6-pack…how many of you WANT to do the work to get one?

Cause it’s really not rocket science. It is simple, but it is not easy.

The goal is never the 6-pack…it’s taking care of your body.

It’s knowing you treat yourself well. It’s knowing that raising your heart rate is good for your heart’s health…not focusing on the calories you burned.

When you take good care of yourself…you just so happen to get a 6-pack.

DRINKING

cut the bullshit with the “I can’t drink because I need to lose 5 pounds”…

I drink all the time....and I’ve had a 6-pack the whole time.

My hangover cure is going for a 5-6 mile run.

You can do it all…so long as you do it all…every morning after I drink I always go for a run. Not only do I sweat it out and get back to feeling great, but it offsets the calories from drinking...and it’s a fun way to recount the great memories from the night before...which makes you happy...which gives you energy...which gives you a special zest for life...which people feel...which makes you magnetic...which makes you love your life...so you take care of yourself...and the cycle repeats and your life gets better

Here’s a fun story:

I was on an island in the Bahamas last 4th of July & these girls came up to me at the bar.

They said “hey were you running around the island earlier?”

I said “indeed I was”

and they said “we drove past you and we looked at each other and said ‘omg he literally looks like a Ken Doll.’”

Needless to say, we proceeded to gain a few lbs from all the Rum Runners we drank...but...many good memories to think about when you jog it off the next day...

If you want daily tips helping you become the VERY best version of yourself, subscribe to my Substack:

Cole Jaczko

Stop guzzling supplements and sitting in cold plunges. Start doing the things that actually change your life. Become fully confident to take risks, master modern dating, build wealth investing, find your purpose, and become magnetically charismatic.

I give you a MENTAL 6-Pack. Advice across:
Mindsets, Confidence, Dating, Investing, Magnetic Energy, and other secrets to help you win the game of life

CLOSING THOUGHTS

At the end of the day, it isn’t about supplements/diet/workout fads.

It’s about the standards you have for yourself.

You should demand more from you for you. That’s it.

Demand more from you.

It’s also not about abs or muscles - it’s about loving the work.

LOVING the process of pushing yourself to be your best, and, ultimately, investing in yourself and your body so you can be healthy, not just looksmaxxing.

SUBSCRIBE FOR MORE:

Cole Jaczko

Stop guzzling supplements and sitting in cold plunges. Start doing the things that actually change your life. Become fully confident to take risks, master modern dating, build wealth investing, find your purpose, and become magnetically charismatic.

This is the best question to see if you should bet on them:

Can they make it all back?

Life punches back. There will be times you’ll get hit right in the face, and you’ll have to gather yourself and fight back.

However someone feels about that one question tells you everything you need to know about them?

If they lose it all on an investment, lose a lover, lose a job, etc.

Do they know they can build it all back better than before?

Yes - fearless. On offense. Plays to win.

No - scared. On defense. Plays to not lose.

Everything is downstream from that

You’re either afraid of life or not.

Show me someone who is afraid to lose and I will show you someone I can beat every day of the week.

Have to be ok with the possibility of losing.

To win, you have to risk losing...and it is always worth losing.

https://x.com/maliktheoracle/status/1757056766636875966?s=48&t=2hl12CSNSpzZA_naZyg70A

They truly always feel it.

And no doubt, that’s why great things always do happen for them.

Keep in mind, it literally just takes one.

Fortunes are made every day and dreams come true every day. Today could be your day ! Expect it to be. Expect great things to be just around the corner and right about to happen.

Cause you know what every famous artist, athlete, singer, founder, creator, DJ has in common? They were not that when they started.

Always feel that you’re on the come up. Today is the day you start your meteoric, parabolic rise.

However, since you know that, enjoy today. Realize that the minute your parabolic rise starts, your life will never be the same again…

Want to be a famous artist/actress -> when it happens, you can never go back to a “normal life”

Want to be a successful founder -> imagine ur life running a $1Bn company with 400 employees. You’ve got HR and investors up your ass and you might miss those early days when it was just you and your friend starting the company.

Even in dating → there’s a great song…Single Saturday Night

You will get everything you want.

So now that you know that, enjoy right now…cause when you get everything you want you might want to come back to where you are now…just for the chance to experience the journey.

Expect the come up so you can enjoy it

Really there’s no secret, you love yourself the same way you love anyone else.

You accept them as they are.

YOU HELP THEM BECOME THE BEST VERSION OF THEM.

We all have flaws - only fake flowers are flawless.

But like the person you love, you LOVE their flaws. It’s what makes you love them as much as you do.

So why don’t you do that for yourself.

But here’s how I learned to love myself.

I was in a 6 year relationship and my girlfriend broke up with me suddenly. I got rocked and took the heartbreak really hard (it was my first time lol be nice !)

A few months later, she told me she was seeing someone new.

If you’ve been there, you know that’s the absolute worst lol. Pure pain hahaha

And after many sleepless nights just thinking the worst thoughts, comparing myself to however this new guy was I was like you know what…fuck it.

He’s gotta live up to my shoes. He’s gotta try to be better than me. Better than Jazzy? Ya foooookin right?! Sucks to be him lol.

And I channeled that energy. I thought about myself, how special I am, how amazing I am, how loving, how great, and all the amazing/great things in my life.

I thought about who I am and where I’m headed.

I simply just decided for myself the opinions I have about myself.

And I realized there was nothing but love for who I am, so why wouldn’t I love myself so much.

And whats great is once you decide for yourself - it’s basically a joke when anyone tries to say anything about you.

“Okay and …?” That’s not the opinion I have of me and I know me better than you so why do i care what your opinion is?

So just look at yourself.

Look at what a legend/icon you are.

See yourself in the best light and make that be the opinion you have of yourself.

Never deviate, only ever make it bigger/better/more beautiful.

• no one can say anything about you. Anything someone says about you is what they say about themselves.

• Nothing in life should be taken personally. Everything is a reflection of the other. The universe is a mirror. Someone may have been rude to you, but if you weren’t there they would’ve taken it out on someone else.

• I already decided it for myself so applause and criticism go in the same pile.

• Your life will get so much better when you stop critiquing yourself and every little thing you do. You can’t shame yourself to being happy. Just accept that you’re not perfect, you’re going to make some mistakes, and sometimes the ball isn’t gonna bounce your way. You’re still gonna be fine because you’re as perfect as you are, it only takes one success to erase your mistakes, and the ball will bounce your way for what it’s supposed to.

• It takes a strong person to stand by themselves and hold out for what they know they’re worth. Nowadays people settle for anything just to say they have something.

• No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

• if the words you spoke appeared on your skin, would you still be beautiful

• You’re so full of love, give yourself some.

• At my best friend I was listening to him talk about his wife. He said how she is the best thing to ever happen to him. I thought about how excited I am to feel the same way about someone and how I can’t wait to love them. I’m so full of love that I know that I’d love them so much they’d feel on top of the world. But then I realized…I am that for me. If I can make someone feel on top of the world, then i can just do that for me. i can love myself so much I’m on top of the world. I will be someone’s best thing, but until then I’m going to be that for me.

• You will be the best thing to ever happen to someone. Until then, be that for yourself

• Make sure your center of gravity doesn’t exist outside of yourself

• Long ago, I just decided that I like me. I don’t need you to like me to like me. I already like me. I’m good.

• life is a mirror. The beauty you see in anything is a reflection of the beauty you see in you.

• If you love yourself someone else is going to love you too. Because all any of us really do is copy what others do. Hope that makes sense. Just a thought.

• but we are our own sun.

• be like the sun. burn so brightly for yourself that you light up the whole world.

• If you went back and fixed all your mistakes you’d erase yourself.

• Only fake flowers are flawless.

• We are all born so beautiful. THe greatest tragedy is being convinced we are not.

• He never knew he wasn’t a superhero.

• I became the love I searched for.

• I’m the love of my own life

• If a man expects a woman to be an angel in his life, he must first create Heaven for her. Angels don’t live in hell.

• The best part about loving yourself is there’s no imagine to maintain. You get to do things purely because you want to. Some will love it and some won’t. And best of all, that has no bearing on you. How can you lose when you’re being and doing you?

• You can be in the most beautiful home in the world but you’re still trapped in your head at night

• “At the end of every day, we sleep with ourselves” - Matthew McConaughey

• All the water in the world can’t sink a ship unless it gets inside.

• The irony of it all is you’re most attractive when you’re not worried about who you’re attracting

• Biggest hypeman or harshest critic. you’re choice.

• Why do you spend all day just bully yourself? What good does that do you?

• I realized I was bullying myself…

• “life is just hanging out with yourself. You should be your own best friend.” - Ed Routh

• Who you are is what makes you most attractive

• Her vibe is attractive. People think she’s stuck in her own little world but I like the fact that all she cares about is her own happiness.

• “Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and how you do it.” - Maya Angelou

• Make sure you have your own back

• Ask yourself: are you doing this for you or are you performing for a non-existent audience in your head.

• Know ya worth. Just saw a sick 1989 retro car with a for sale sign on it. Price? ‘Not Cheap.’ Made me think - that’s how you should value yourself. You’re not cheap either. Any should you be! Make sure you’re getting your fair value from everything - career, relationships, etc. Just because you may want something doesn’t mean someone else should get a better deal on yourself than you get for yourself. You’re not cheap. Know your worth and make sure you get every cent of it. In life, you get what you pay for. There’s a reason a Ferrari is more expensive than a Ford

• “The only journey is the one within”

• You cannot trick the mirror into smiling first. You must smile first.

• Make your mind and soul the most beautiful things about you.

• So i just decided that I am perfect. Life is too short to spend my time hating my reflection.

• In order to love who you are, you cannot hate the things that shaped you.

• There’s not a single person who hasn’t made a mistake, embarrassed themselves, or disliked their appearance. We are all humans. And to be a human is to be imperfect.

• If you struggle with confidence, being hard on yourself, get scared sometimes, don’t worry…we all do. Don’t overestimate the competition.

• Comparison is the thief of joy.

you look in a mirror and think that you look ugly or fat

you compare yourself to others and feel like you aren’t good enough

why?

you wouldn’t hang out with a friend who treated you like that so why treat yourself like that??

Yes you’re bullying youself.

You talk shit to yourself allll day long.

You are. I was too.

Lemme tell you a personal story.

In December 2022, I was on a run thru Venice LA as I always did.

I literally had to stop because I started crying.

Why?

Lemme back up.

4 months prior, my gf of 6 years broke up with me suddenly.

I obviously took it hard as it was my first time dealing with heartbreak.

When you’re going through that, you obviously aren’t being very kind to yourself.

You let how someone else feels about you dictate how you feel about you.

You feel unloved, unworthy, and much more.

You focus on the love lost instead of the love you have.

As you probably know, in that time I had left my private equity job in search of a new career.

I had been deep in convos with Kygo’s Venture Capial firm, Palm Tree Crew.

Earlier that day, the CEO called me to give me a job offer.

As part of it, I gave him my references for reference checks.

The CEO told me not only that I had the job, but he wanted to say something:

He said, “I’ve done a lot of reference checks and you should know yours were the most positive I’ve ever heard. It was so clear not only that everyone thought so highly of you, but they genuinely loved you and wanted the best for you.”

That really stuck with me.

So, I went on a run to process everything.

A mile 4 is when I started crying.

Why?

I realized I was bullying myself.

For months I had been in a rut because I was focused on the 1 person who no longer loved me instead of all the people who do love me.

So what I realized is:

what you have > what you lost / don’t have

when you focus on what you lost or don’t have you simply are bullying yourself.

I realized I am loved by so many people - people you don;t even think about.

Of course your family and friends.

But also your bosses, your coworkers, your neighbors, the local people at your go to spots.

You light up the world. Truly.

Yet, you walk around all day just talking shit to yourself, insulting yourself. What’s the point of that?

How’s that going to do you any good.

It should make you want to cry! Think of how mean you’ve been to yourself!

I cried thinking of a younger version of me in elementary school…what if I had a bully? How much would I want to stand up for the 10 year old version of me?

I’d stand up for him…yet I’m the one bullying myself

So i vowed to never do it again.

No mas.

From here on out, I’d be my biggest hypeman, not my harshest critic.

Think of how you talk to yourself.

Imagine looking at yourself in a mirror.

What kind of things do you say to yourself?

You look great! Omg that’s such a good color on you. Wow, you truly look so good in that. You’re gorgeous/handsome.

You look in such good shape too right - you’ve been killing it in the gym.

Right?

No - it’s literally all the opposite.

I look fat. Eww, look at how ___ looks. This is horrible. I hate it.

Why are you like that?

Now imagine if that was your friend trying something on?

What do you say to them?

How much do you hype them up?

How much do you make them feel their best and confident in what they’re wearing

And you know what, they believe it.

So they buy it.

Then they wear it out

PROUDLY

and they rock it

and everyone tells them they look great

And its a positive flywheel

So why do you talk to yourself like such a dick?

you’re either your biggest hypeman or harshest critic - your choice.

• put yourself out there

• be bold

• take risks

• forge your own path

• do things that scare you / are hard

• be willing to fail repeatedly

• not care about judgement/embarrassement

• Have tons of confidence to do all the above

How do you expect to do all of that if you don’t like yourself?

If you aren’t a diehard fan of yourself, how are you going to keep going when someone tries to judge you

If you are hard on yourself with your appearance, how do you expect to have the confidence to take the world by storm?

If you’re going to have the aura to put yourself out there and take risks, how are you going to do that when you don’t even believe in yourself?

How are you going to get a soulmate to love you if you dont even love yourself?

Why should someone else bet on you when you’re not even betting on yourself?

Exactly…

you gotta learn to love yourself.

Biggest hypeman or harshest critic - your choice.

The chosen ones just chose themselves. Really that simple.

Snoop Dogg: I wanna thank me:

The chosen ones just chose themselves. Really that simple.

If you love yourself, others will too.

Monkey see, monkey do.

What I’ve come to learn is if you want to be loved, love yourself.

There is nothing more magnetic than when you like your own energy.

People can feel that.

People are socially conforming creatures, so if they see you loving yourself, they’ll love you too.

Just the same way as we buy the clothes we see other people wearing.

The problem with most people is they dont love themselves

they have a hole in their cup of love

and they DESPERATELY want someone to come in and patch it

to put them out of their misery

So they cling to anyone and anything that will give them love to finally validate them

that’s just not how it works.

you have to learn to love yourself before you can fully love someone else

Chris Martin: no one is our missing piece we are all whole:

RUSS: all these things Im chasing I had to give to myself

@russIT WAS YOU ALL ALONG

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He was talking about how his now wife is the “best thing to ever happen to him.”

I was thinking what a lovely thing that is.

I was, of course, thinking about how excited I am to feel that way about Miss Jazzy (GOAT).

I am so full of love I know that I will make her feel like the most special girl on the world.

Then i thought more about it.

If i can make HER feel on top of the world because of MY love, the love within me, then I can make MYSELF feel on top of the world too.

She is going to feel like the luckiest person alive to wake up next to me or grab coffee with me, so why can’t I just feel that way about myself right now?

Anything I can give to someone else comes from within me, so I can give to myself.

The same way anything someone can give to me, I can give to myself too.

So I just decided that until then I am going to be the best thing to ever happen to me.

I treat myself the way I would my soulmate.

I make myself feel on top of the world.

I’m so full of love, so I’m filling myself up with my own love.

try getting high on your own supply.

I have a red blotch on the side of my cheek. I don’t know what it is.

Not even kidding, it is not uncommon for people to try to wipe it off because they think it is a pretty lady’s lipstick.

It is not.

It’s permanant. It’s a FLAW (the horror!)

Or is it?

You can actually decide whether or not things are flaws.

What if it’s just a cool marking?

What if it’s something that makes me unique?

Why can’t you lean into your flaws and actually turn them into signature traits?

Who says they are flaws?

Not you unless you agree!

So anyways, there’s no such thing as perfect - only fake flowers are flawless!

You’re not perfect.

None of us are.

And if you’re perfect it’s boring anyways.

There’s a missing beauty in some things that are too perfect ya know?

The real beauty lies in the fact that we all have our shortcomings and have to overcome them.

That’s whats honestly what gives you depth to your character…and that is what is beautiful.

Every great story starts by someone overcoming something.

When you’re too perfect, no one can resonate with that.

If I just created content sharing how great I am, how great my life is, flexing the veins in my bicep, showing off the incredible views from where I live, my watches, etc…people might think I’m cool but they can’t reasonate with that.

They resonate with the shortcomings, the ugly blemishes, the insecurities.

My competitive edge is that no one can compete with me. I am more vulnerable than them.

I do’t view vulnerability as a weakness (like my blemishes) - they’re super powers.

They’re a part of my story or who I am. And I love my story and who I am.

I wouldn’t change a think.

That truly is what makes you beautiful.

Accept yourself…you can’t love yourself by hating the things that shaped you

• 4 agreements

  • be impeccable with your word

  • don’t take anything personally

  • don’t make assumptions. express what you want and mean

  • always do your best

• humans grow up and are taught to be domesticated. like training a dog, we are told we are good when we do things people want us to and bad when we don’t. we are taught to seek these rewards by doing what others want us to. we are taught to please others to get rewards. the fear of being rejected becomes the fear of not being enough. eventually, we become someone we are not or didn’t want to be

• it takes great courage to challenge our own and others beliefs.

• humans are the only animal that pays for the same mistake millions of times. we and society will constantly remind ourselves of this mistake, and we feel bad, thus paying for it many times

• what is the point for humans to suffer, to live in fear, and be trapped by emotional dramas?

• human society is difficult to live in because it is ruled by fear. we label people who follow their dreams hero’s and courageous bc so few do it

  • This is difficult to live in and it can be compared to hell.

  • Religions say that hell is a place of punishment, a place of fear, pain, and suffering, a place where the fire burns you.

  • Fire is generated by emotions that come from fear. Whenever we feel the emotions of anger, jealousy, envy, or hate, we experience a fire burning within us.

• We are living in a dream of hell since most of our lives are ruled by fear, envy, suffering. we learn to dream of hell bc of these negative emotions rule the day..don’t let them!

  • We don’t need to dream a nightmare. it is possible to enjoy a pleasant dream... and life

• All of humanity is searching for truth, justice, and beauty. We keep searching and searching, when everything is already within us. There is no truth to find.

  • It is as if we live in the middle of a fog that doesn’t let us see any further than our own nose.

  • We live in a fog that is not even real. this fog keeps us from seeing who we are and realizing that we are free

• To be alive is the biggest fear humans have. death is not the biggest fear we have; our biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive and express what we really our. just being ourselves is the biggest fear of humans

  • odd since being yourself is such a super power. it’s so rare anyone is themselves these days, but it’s biggest edge. you can’t be someone else just be yourself. Everyone else is already taking.

  • You see certificates of authenticity for luxury goods. What about that for humans - knowing youself. being yourself. living for yourself.

  • why? we were conditioned to live to please other’s demand. fear of rejection and not being good enough for someone else. no one is themselves nor lives for themselves anymore and its gotten worse since all our entire lives are on social media, for everyone’s eyes

  • one point of life is to maximize your potential. you can never do that if you’re trying to fit someone else’s ideals. just focus on being your best self. that’s attainable and that’s enough!

  • accept yourself. don’t worry if others accept you. ALL YOU CAN CONTROL IS HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT YOURSELF

    • If you feel good about yourself, likely other’s will feed off that energy too.

    • But, who cares - what does it matter to you if someone likes you or not...YOU ALREADY LIKE YOURSELF...

      • If someone doesn’t like your favorite food, does that change how much you like it? NOOO...so feel that way about yourself

• nobody abuses us as much as we abuse ourself. the way we judge ourselves is the worst judge ever existed. Vow to be easy on myself. I will be my own biggest hypeman, not critic

• we have the need to be accepted and loved by others, but we cannot accept and love ourselves. the more self-love we have, the less self-abuse we tolerate

  • stand up for yourself like you’d stand up to a school bully to protect someone else

  • Think about your own self-talk. You just talk shit to yourself allllll day long. Why?

    • Think of someone you love. You’d never let them be mean to themselves. When they think they don’t look good in a dress, what do you say to them? See how quick you are to hype them up?

      • But do you do that for yourself?

    • Or what about when they say they can’t do something?

      • Do you agree and say they suck, everyone hates them?

      • No, you tell them they can do it.

    • You love them so much you’d never let them be hard on themselves Are you there for yourself like that?

    • if anything, you are lying to yourself. you are harder on yourself than anyone else views you. you are so much better than what you give yourself credit for, thus lying.

• Why don’t you think the highest of yourself?

  Other people see you in a higher light than you see yourself !! That’s crazy

  They believe in you more than you believe in yourself !!

• if you want to live a life of joy and fulfillment, you have to find the courage to break those agreements that are fear-based and mute your personal shit talking

  • living in fear USES energy. living in love PROVIDES energy. it’s never hard to wake up at 4am to do something you love like catching a flight for vacation

• be impeccable with your word

  • it is through words you manifest everything

  • word is the most powerful tool we have. we are the only animal with it. it’s a two-edged sword. can create the most beautiful dream or the most insufferable hell

  • you possess all the magic with your words. we have power of reality with our thoughts. use them for good, not bad. make your reality good, not bad with thoughts

  • the human mind is a fertile ground where seeds are continually planted. your word plants a thought and it grows. the only problem is your mind is often planting and growing fears. prepare it to receive seeds of beauty and love and joy

  • we are ruled by the agreements on our mind - the thoughts which we have grown to believe, for good reason or not. I am beautiful or I am ugly. I am worthy or not. I am lucky or the victim. we believe the ones we think.

    • careful the agreements you make with yourself. someone can’t make you feel replaceable, hard to love, ugly, unworthy etc. The may project their own feelings on you with how they treat you or act. that’s their problem, not yours. this is not an agreement you have to agree to yourself. do not accept that agreement. stay true to yourself and your agreements with your self through loving, beautiful, happy words.

      • if you accept an opinion, it can become an agreement. be careful. they start as opinions or snark comments or low energy feelings

      • forgive these people. it’s them projecting their own problems and they don’t know what they did

      • break the spell by making an agreement with truth. you know how most people view you. importantly I know how good I am. “only the truth will set us free”

  • being impeccable is taking responsibility for your actions, but not judging or blaming yourself. it is what it is. reserve judgement until the end. use your energy to love yourself

    • being impeccable is not going against yourself, not thinking ugly thoughts, being your teammate not your enemy

    • being impeccable protects you from negative thoughts, especially spells from others. you will only receive a negative idea if your mind allows those things to be planted. shoo them away - not welcome here

    • only accept words of positivity that benefit you and the garden of your mind

    • you measure impeccability of your word by your level of self-love. how much you love yourself and how you feel about yourself is proportionate to the quality of your word. when you are impeccable with your word, you feel good, hapoy, and at peace

    • you transcend the dream of hell by impeccability of your word. you can be immune to hell and create your world of abundance, success, love and happinesss, and freedom from fears

    • I am impeccable with my word. I only receive and think good thoughts. my mind is planing a beautiful garden and I only accept thiughts of self-love, love, happiness, and joy. I am wonderful. I love myself. I’m proud of myself. I am amazing and great.

  • how we feel is what we bring out in others. if I love you and compliment you, you likely will do the same for me

  • gossip is main form of communication. we feel better about ourselves bringing someone down. unites peolle in agreement vs someone else. “misery loves company”. look at sports channels gossiping about Tom Brady or LeBron who has accomplished 1000x what they ever did

    • Talk is cheap. People just dont have anything better to do

    • Who cares about the people talking shit anyways? They dont have enough good in their life to tend to that their busy looking at and commenting on what other’s are doing. Losers.

    • Never seen any person I admire who just shits around and talks shit - they all have better shit to do. So who cares about the opinions of those who talk shit??

  • think about how we use words with ourself. rarely out of love! what do we say more: I look fat, I look ugly, I’m getting old, I’m pale VERSUS I’m in great shape, I look uhhh fantastique, I’m the mothafuggin man. this is how we use word AGAINST ourselves and start to believe these.

• don’t take anything personally

  • Basically nothing should be taken personally. every bad faith interaction with someone is entirely a reflection on them, not you. It happened to you - its not about you. If they weren’t there, they would’ve taken it out on someone else.

  • peoples opinions about you are reflections into how they feel about themselves. don’t let it corrupt how you love yourself!! don’t agree to their agreements.

  • our selfish desires make us feel everything is about us. it’s not. no one cares about you. everyone is worried about themselves. release yourself and be free

  • it is not important to me what you think about me. I don’t take what you think as an agreement with myself.

    • I already know how I feel about myself. I love myself. Whether or not you love me is honestly a you problem. No bearing on me.

    • it is your movie. you are the main character. you are living for yourself. everyone else is a secondary role. don’t play scared. make it an epic movie. and remember, like all epic movies it’s a journey and the victory comes after battling through setbacks and hard times

    • if you live without fear, if you love, there is no place for these negative emotions. if you don’t feel negative emotions, it is logical you will feel good. when you feel good, everything around you is good. when everything around you is great, everything makes you happy. happiness is self-fulfilling - you then feel happier. you love everything around you, because you love yourself. because you like who you are. content with who you are. happy with your life. happy with the movie you are producing, happy with your agreements. you are at peace and happy. you’re in a state of bliss where everything is so wondering and beautiful. you are making love all the time with everything you perceive

  • you do not need people to tell you things like you’re wonderful - I know that I am wonderful know that already

    • even your own opinions aren’t necessarily true. sometimes we abuse ourselves and lie to ourselves you don’t even need to take your own thoughts personally. don’t let them take root and plant a bad seed

  • you don’t need to be attached to pain. healing is on the way and it’s just a matter of time before things get better

    • humans are addicted to their sufferings. these agreements reinforce this.

    • if someone didn’t treat you with love or respect, it is good they walk away from you. if not, you will continue to endure that. it may hurt for a while but your heart will heal. then you can choose what you want

  • freedom comes from not taking things personally because you’re free of low level emotions

  • becoming immune will anger people, but not you!

  • you will be living for yourself. you don’t need others. you are in control and all that matters. you don’t need anyone. you are responsible for you

  • you can say I love you without fear of rejection. you can ask for what you need. you can say yes or no - whatever you want - without worrying about others. you can choose to follow your heart. you can stay in peace and bliss and he’ll won’t effect you

• Dont Make Assumptions

  • we make assumptions and assume things are real. but that may not be the case. often just creates drama and taking things personally

    • we create drama out of nothing

    • we create a lot of emotional positions by making assumptions and taking things personally. then we gossip about this

  • we are afraid to ask for clarification, and then we make assumptions that are wrong

    • always ask for clarification. make sure you know exactly what things are / intended to be. when we don’t understand, we assume

  • assumptions set up for suffering - either we are wrong or we regret things

  • we only see and hear what we want. we don’t perceive things as they are

  • our mind has a need to make everything tidy. it needs answers to everything. that’s not how things go. some things just happen

  • we assume everyone sees life as we do. we assume others think, feel, see things the same way. this is why we have a fear of being ourselves around others - we think they will judge us the way we judge ourselves and will see our shortfalls. even before others can reject us, we reject ourselves

  • in love and life, we see what we want to see and ignore disconfirming evidence. we think we can change someone. you can’t change anyone unless they want to change

  • we have to be what we are, so we don’t present a false imagine. this is me. you either love me, great, or don’t then bye

  • the only way to not make assumptions is to ask questions. seek clarity. communicate. understand

  • don’t ask; don’t get. find your voice to ask for what you want. everyone has the right to tell you yes or no, but you also have the right to ask

  • clear communication avoids problems, saves time, and gets to better solutions

• always do your best

  • sometimes your best is 120% and others it’s 80%…just do your best. importantly, don’t try to do more than your best since that’s not possible and is actually counterproductive. drains the body

  • All you can do is YOUR best. All you can do. do that and just be happy with that.

    • if you always do your best, there is no way you can judge yourself. if you don’t judge, no suffering from blame or guilt. if you do your best, that’s all you can do. the results take care of themselves. sometimes you won or lost - but you did all you can control - you were your best. What’s there to judge when you can say to yourself “I did my best”. when I didn’t get Valiant job, it was easy to let go. no regrets, no sweat.

    • you can accept yourself while also learning from mistakes. it’s important to do that to be your best. tell the truth tuesdays!

  • just by working / grinding longer, it doesn’t mean you’ll achieve success any quicker. in fact, you are not here to sacrifice your joy or your life. you are here to live, to be happy, and to love. if you do can your best in two hours of work, but you spend eight, you will only grow tired, miss the point, and wont enjoy your life. do your best, and perhaps you will learn that no matter how long you meditate, you can live, love, and be hapoy

  • doing your best, you are going to live intensely. you are going to be productive, good to yourself, giving to family and community

    • this single focus will make you happy. you will be taking action - and taking action on things you love bc you care about being your best, not for some reward

    • can’t just work for a reward. by doing this you learn to resist the work since it’s not done out of love; it’s forced. when it’s forced, you don’t do your best

      • avoid situations when you “have to” do some thing. have to work to pay rent, etc

    • working M-F and then only 2 days to themselves. what do they do? try to escape bc they don’t like their lives. get drunk, waste time.

    • if you do something without expecting a reward, you’re doing it because you WANT to. otherwise you wouldn’t do jt

    • if we like what we do, if we always do our best, then we are really enjoying life. we are having fun, don’t get bored, not frustrating, living for ourselves and to the fullest

  • figure out what you love. take action to do them (thats how you life fully). do it out of love, not for a reward. take the risks to go out and fulfill your dreams, don’t succumb to fear and instead “have to” do things. by doing this, you will be doing your best. doing your best gets you rewarded by the universe

  • Thee best way to life your life is to focus on being your best. let go of the past and live in the present. it’s about you remember! whatever life takes away from you, let it go. it was an experience FOR you. enjoy the dream happening TODAY and focus your energy on being your best today

  • living in the past means you wish todays dream were different. there is no time to miss anything or anyone because you are ALIVE today. if you’re not present, you’re only half alive. that’s a waste and leads to pity and suffering

  • practice makes the master. you won’t be perfect, but you can DO your best

    • action is what makes the difference. you are either doing it or staying put. you are either getting it done or not

  • I will find what I am are looking for. Always have.

  • honor the person you are. tell yourself you love you! I have said “love you” so much less without a gf. why don’t I say it the same amount but just to me!

  • give love to every part of your body through the day. thinking is loving your mind, showering is cleasnifng and healing the body, working out is strengthening, food is fuel

• why should you care?

  • doing this will give you a beautiful life and 100% control over your life, minds, and thiughts

• have a strong enough will to keep these agreements in face of obstacles. I am impeccable with my word. I will not take things personally. I will seek clarity and ask questions to avoid making assumptions. I am doing my best.

• If you fall, do not judge. the journey is hard. it’s why only a few people live in heaven and most stuck in hell

  • if you break an agreement, just remake the ageeement and start today and do it the next day

• do not be concerned with the future. do your best and everything will happen better than you expected. keep your attention on today and being your best. stay in the present moment. take action.

• all over the world, everyone is fighting for freedom. America is the freest country, but are we truly free? NO. who is stopping us? ourselves. our fear of taking risks instead puts us in chains that restrict our freedom and force us to do things

  • we seek things that restrict our freedoms.

  • be like a wild animal, not a domesticated one

  • DO YOU AND DO WHAT YOU WANT. THAT IS FREE

  • you observe children as free. they are wild. they are having fun and exploring the world. they are not afraid of playing, getting hurt, trying things. they don’t think about the past or worry about the future. they are in the moment

  • why are adults no longer wild? RESPONSIBILITIES

    • we feel like we HAVE to do things bc it’s what we SHOULD do bc others did it that way. we try to please society so we are no longer being who we really are. we focus on pleasing others and not ourselves so we are no longer happy

  • need to make yourself aware of problems, since that’s the only way to solve them

    • become aware, wise, wild, and then free

• the function of the mind is to dream. make it a fairytale not a nightmare!

  • be aware that we are dreaming all the time. most people are walking around just trapped in their own mind. use it to be a superpower not a challenger

• you are a warrior in a war against the parasite of the mind. we are a warrior in a war for our minds and emotions. warriors have complete control over the emotions and behaviors. “afraid but do it anyways”

  • the parasite has a thousand heads for each of our fears. do not feed the parasite. starve it. kill it from the inside - do not give fuel to our emotions that come from fear, envy, jealous, anxiety, external factors

• Go into the desert. meet your demons face to face. after coming out, your demons turn into angels

  • break agreements that make you suffer with ones that make you happy. occupy the same thought with a positive agreement instead of a negative one. demons -> angels. silent critics -> stadium of fans

• go slow. it’s a slow process. these agreements have been made over 27 years

  • we are addicted to being who we are. we are addicted to anger, jealousy and self-pity. we are addicted to thinking we aren’t good enough. we are addicted because we have repeated these thiughts over and over. it’s a habit! to break them, need even more repetition of action.

• our emotions drive our energy level. good emotions give us extra fuel. bad emotions drain us

  • our emotional scars are wounds. stop touching them and actually heal them. to heal them, remove the poison. forgive those who wrong you. not because they deserve it, because YOU DO. let it go. focus on you and your life. do it out of love for yourself to not make the wound worse. forgiveness is the only way to heal. “I will no longer be the victim or beat myself up”

  • you only know you have forgiven someone when you see them and no longer have an emotional reaction. more progress to go…

    • have to be able to have someone touch the wound and it not hurt

• death is the greatest teacher. it should teach us to be alive.

  • live like you don’t know how many days you have. love every moment to be happy and enjoy life. don’t wait for 10 years or retirement to do that. the ride may be shorter than we think

  • I am alive. I am grateful for everything because i am alive. one more day to be myself and make the most of it. I love myself because I am doing my best and that’s all I can do/control.

  • im not afraid of anything. I treat people with love because this could be the last day I can tell you how much I love you. I don’t want to fight bc I may not see you again. what do any of us care what others think? all of our stories end the same way in the end - no one better than the other

    • we are so afraid of death that we never even live!!

  • live in the present. the past is dead and the future is unknown.

• perceive love happiness and joy from everything you see and everyone you meet

• truly imagine what it would be like to live your life to fulfill your dreams, without fear to ask for what you want say what’s on your mind do what you want and go for what you dream of. imagine living without fears or judgement or abusing yourself. imagine living without the fear of not being loved - you a) love yourself and b) are surrounded by love so that’s never the case. walk into the world with your heart open and not afraid to be hurt. imagine living your life without being afraid to take a risk and explore life. you aren’t afraid to lose something. you aren’t afraid to be alive and not afraid to die. imagine loving yourself just the way you are and know you’re perfect and as you should be - you’re doing your best

  • imagine these because it is entirely possible to do all of this! you can live with this as your reality, or doing the opposite. both are choices!!

• being in love puts you in a state of bliss. it amplifies everything. I know it because I’ve had it. I’ve had love and I’ve lost it. but I gained it again. how? Well life is all up to ylu. no one can give you something that you can’t give yourself. LOVE yourself and love your life so much. that is bliss. you can live this way all the time

  • one can be very easy and fun and happy when love is your way of life

  • I loved being in love. it made me super happy. so do it. love myself. love my life. love family, friends, strangers. love the journey. love each day. love being alive. love it all. love the hard, crappy things cause they’re better than the alternative!

• there is no reason to suffer. suffering, like happiness and love, is a choice. make better choices

How much time have you spent comparing yourself to someone you don’t even remember anymore?

Been thinking more about Alex Coopers quote.

It’s a good way to phrase a lot of what I implemented in my life years ago.

Don’t compare yourself to others & their lives.

You often don’t know the full picture.

Ask yourself, “would I trade my life for theirs?”

My answer to that is always no. Hope yours is too.

I wouldn’t trade my family, friends, experiences, and opportunity set for anyone else’s.

Does someone else have it better? I honestly don’t know and don’t care.

All I know is I’m very lucky. I love my life, the people in it, the places I’ve been, memories made, and amazing things to come.

Sure, someone may have more money or fly private more, but does that mean they have a better life?

Those are just things. The best things aren’t things.

Do they have better family and friends, memories, experiences, etc?

Idk!

I’m not saying this to say how great my life is / that’s not the point…this isn’t just about me/my life, I hope everyone feels this way about their lives.

My experiences are what they are with people that I love and they’ve brought me so much happiness. That’s special to me. I wouldn’t trade that away. Since that’s the case, whats the point in comparing to others? We can’t have it all (even though we want it all and social media exaggerates this), but we all have more than we think. Put your blinders on to focus on you, be present, and be grateful for how good we really have it. You don’t win a race by looking to the side to see where others are.